having welcomed and accepted my addiction(wrong choice of word here maybe...) to Azeroth, I feel compelled to dedicate this one-of-the-many-more-to-come(AND YOU BETTER FREAKING BELIEVE IT) post to the...........
!!!
(dumdumdum~~~)
My bed, my room, my World of Warcraft.
Ah~ the sweet, life sucking, time wasting world of Warcraft.
It costs about 16 Aus dollars for the monthly fee(what, you think this game is FREE??? dream on suckers!!!), where you'll be free to roam the world of Azeroth and Outlands, saving the helpless and rescuing fair damsels from firey dragons - all in a day's work to champion the saviors of the Burning Legion.
Ah~ the sweet, life sucking, time wasting world of Warcraft.
It costs about 16 Aus dollars for the monthly fee(what, you think this game is FREE??? dream on suckers!!!), where you'll be free to roam the world of Azeroth and Outlands, saving the helpless and rescuing fair damsels from firey dragons - all in a day's work to champion the saviors of the Burning Legion.
well....KEEP DREAMING HOMIES!
The world, created by the Blizzard gods of Canada was built in such a way, to suck the living lights from your life and squeeze the very fabric of your wallet/purse/paycheck/pocket/inheritance money/bank account/coin jar/cookie box/glove compartment of your car, while you desperately try to get to level 70 and start raiding Black Temple.
The game was conceived by the bloodsuckers who brought you your best-omfg-favourite-est games such as StarCraft I, II(and BW), Warcraft I, II, III(and TFT)...and who else could neglect, that Diablo series you can but dream of killing Diablo himself in Nightmare mode. And from their masterminds, came a game; not just any game, but "THE" game...from which there is no escape to your previous life of vigor and social existence!
16 Aus dollars/month you say?! that's ok i thought. not too bad, for the most single popular game in the known universe.
how Blizzard suck your life and wealth away you ask? for one thing....leveling in WoW(World of Warcraft - if you haven't already realised...r-tard~) takes the life out of you.
Imagine this: to get to level 5, you'd need to play atleast, say....2 hours maybe. and that's the initial exp boost you get since you're pretty much a noob. Fine, 2 freaking hours lost to the World.....of Warcraft. Come level 15, you would have spent a total of at least 10 hours, 8 if you're the lucky one who knows how and where to level. To get to the much raid-coveted level 70, you'll need 2 months of decent play time. Decent play time, as in at least 8 hours of play each day, which is practically impossible due to the addictiveness of the game. Expect to have at most 5.5 hours of sleep/day.
My Azeroth.
For the better parts of WoW, this is a B-E-A-U-TIFUL game. The requirements to play this game is not very high - imagine a 4 year old budget DELL craptop(crappy laptop) blasting away the trash mobs from Karazhan with minimum lag and screen freeze(only in highly populated places like, Stormwind City). The game mechanics and features in WoW are unrivaled in any other MMORPGs out there to whore itself of your petty, already anorexic wallet.
The best thing to do on a boring Saturday or Monday...or Tuesday...or Friday....or Sunday...or Thursday...or Wednesday...or Anzac Day...for a single guy, lonely and pathetic enough at some place far away from Ktn, like in Perth - with friends similarly afflicted, is to plunge mouse first into the addictive and fantastic world of Warcraft.
16 Aus dollars/month you say?! that's ok i thought. not too bad, for the most single popular game in the known universe.
LIES!
how Blizzard suck your life and wealth away you ask? for one thing....leveling in WoW(World of Warcraft - if you haven't already realised...r-tard~) takes the life out of you.
Imagine this: to get to level 5, you'd need to play atleast, say....2 hours maybe. and that's the initial exp boost you get since you're pretty much a noob. Fine, 2 freaking hours lost to the World.....of Warcraft. Come level 15, you would have spent a total of at least 10 hours, 8 if you're the lucky one who knows how and where to level. To get to the much raid-coveted level 70, you'll need 2 months of decent play time. Decent play time, as in at least 8 hours of play each day, which is practically impossible due to the addictiveness of the game. Expect to have at most 5.5 hours of sleep/day.
Enough wood for the flames...
My Azeroth.
(Ah~ Azeroth. The Deaths, The Glory, The Rez Healers...and the ever ganking HORDES!)
For the better parts of WoW, this is a B-E-A-U-TIFUL game. The requirements to play this game is not very high - imagine a 4 year old budget DELL craptop(crappy laptop) blasting away the trash mobs from Karazhan with minimum lag and screen freeze(only in highly populated places like, Stormwind City). The game mechanics and features in WoW are unrivaled in any other MMORPGs out there to whore itself of your petty, already anorexic wallet.
The best thing to do on a boring Saturday or Monday...or Tuesday...or Friday....or Sunday...or Thursday...or Wednesday...or Anzac Day...for a single guy, lonely and pathetic enough at some place far away from Ktn, like in Perth - with friends similarly afflicted, is to plunge mouse first into the addictive and fantastic world of Warcraft.
...well hey~ i'm not judging you~!
HAIL BURLEX!!!
(http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=251575733)
this post is partially dedicated to Burlex - The man, the legend, the goat...
My minimum requirements to the World of Warcraft.
but hey, would i spend 16 freaking Aus $ a month just to make up for the lack of girl companionship and outdoor social fun??? I mean...would i throw away ~RM50 into this made up, can-never-be-real-EVER world of pixels and fancy light works, when i could easily build my social presence in the loud exciting world of Clubs, shuffling whatever you boys are shuffling these days on whatever you boys call the dance floor these days, drinking booze and scoring chicks?
!!! HELL NO !!!
i would....go get Wowscape!!!!!!!
Wowscape(www.wowscape.net), is the single best closest thing you can have to free sex -
This is made possible, due to Burlex...
Burlex, a god descended from the high moors of GodProgrammingWorld, is here to deliver us the glory of freebies! He hails from Australia, and is the sole genius behind the free WoW private servers, WoWScape, WoWLegion, WoWStorm, and most importantly, my hood...
WoWCrack.
Burlex sends shame to all Blizzard forgotten-gods, having abolished child slavery as well as underage prostitution/gigolotion by giving us the free-to-play WoW servers. His avatar, known by all in the land of Azeroth and the corners in Outlands....as the infamous evil genius Goat God!
Wowscape(www.wowscape.net), is the single best closest thing you can have to free sex -
free WoW!
This is made possible, due to Burlex...
Burlex, a god descended from the high moors of GodProgrammingWorld, is here to deliver us the glory of freebies! He hails from Australia, and is the sole genius behind the free WoW private servers, WoWScape, WoWLegion, WoWStorm, and most importantly, my hood...
WoWCrack.
Burlex sends shame to all Blizzard forgotten-gods, having abolished child slavery as well as underage prostitution/gigolotion by giving us the free-to-play WoW servers. His avatar, known by all in the land of Azeroth and the corners in Outlands....as the infamous evil genius Goat God!
HAIL BURLEX!!!
(http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=251575733)
this post is partially dedicated to Burlex - The man, the legend, the goat...
Craptop Acer 1.73 GHz.
2 GB RAM Memory.
Sweat Saturated, Pirated Sony RM13 Mouse.
Giant ass ebay guitar amplifier, doubling as house rocker slash speakers.
Solo Fizz Drink.
a pair of DC12volts 0.8Watts cpu external fan.
Solo Fizz Drink.
the loud fucking noise of my pair of DC12volts 0.8Watts cpu external fan.
The World of Warcraft.
The World of Warcraft: The Burning Crusade.
2.4 TBC Patch.
Solo Fizz Drink.
At least 5 hours or more of free time.
Free time to make more free time.
Winamp Playlist "ALL.mpu"
and lastly, a can of Solo Fizz Drink.
My recommended requirements to the World of Warcraft.
2 GB RAM Memory.
Sweat Saturated, Pirated Sony RM13 Mouse.
Giant ass ebay guitar amplifier, doubling as house rocker slash speakers.
Solo Fizz Drink.
a pair of DC12volts 0.8Watts cpu external fan.
Solo Fizz Drink.
the loud fucking noise of my pair of DC12volts 0.8Watts cpu external fan.
The World of Warcraft.
The World of Warcraft: The Burning Crusade.
2.4 TBC Patch.
Solo Fizz Drink.
At least 5 hours or more of free time.
Free time to make more free time.
Winamp Playlist "ALL.mpu"
and lastly, a can of Solo Fizz Drink.
My recommended requirements to the World of Warcraft.
Craptop Acer 1.73 GHz.
2 GB RAM Memory.
Sweat Saturated, Pirated Sony RM13 Mouse.
Giant ass ebay guitar amplifier, doubling as house rocker slash speakers.
Solo Fizz Drink.
a pair of DC12volts 0.8Watts cpu external fan.
Solo Fizz Drink.
the loud fucking noise of my pair of DC12volts 0.8Watts cpu external fan.
The World of Warcraft.
The World of Warcraft: The Burning Crusade.
2.4 TBC Patch.
Solo Fizz Drink.
At least 5 hours or more of free time.
Free time to make more free time.
Winamp Playlist "ALL.mpu"
Solo Fizz Drink.
Shower before 8 hours marathon.
Clean underwear.
System of A Down (SoaD) Songs - Chop Suey!, Toxicity, Lonely Day.
FRIENDS - Kahooli a.k.a. Wendy, and Kulgan a.k.a. Luckshan
2 GB RAM Memory.
Sweat Saturated, Pirated Sony RM13 Mouse.
Giant ass ebay guitar amplifier, doubling as house rocker slash speakers.
Solo Fizz Drink.
a pair of DC12volts 0.8Watts cpu external fan.
Solo Fizz Drink.
the loud fucking noise of my pair of DC12volts 0.8Watts cpu external fan.
The World of Warcraft.
The World of Warcraft: The Burning Crusade.
2.4 TBC Patch.
Solo Fizz Drink.
At least 5 hours or more of free time.
Free time to make more free time.
Winamp Playlist "ALL.mpu"
Solo Fizz Drink.
Shower before 8 hours marathon.
Clean underwear.
System of A Down (SoaD) Songs - Chop Suey!, Toxicity, Lonely Day.
FRIENDS - Kahooli a.k.a. Wendy, and Kulgan a.k.a. Luckshan
Kahooli<--------->Kulgan<-------->Cenarin(Me)
My Expectations.
To know how to play WoW, you are expected to be proficient in the languages of English, 1337 SP33K(internet jargons), Orcish, and achieve Intermediate Level in Trash Talking 101.
Be expected to know terms like:-
Gank - (adj.) to kill noobs. Normally prevalent in players suffering the small penis syndrome.
Horde - The opposing gay fags in the World of Warcraft. Commonly found with term "Gank".
Lol - Laugh out loud - endearment to be spiteful/sarcastic/noobish/fagful/lame.
Kek (Orcish) - Orcish for "Lol".
Zaga (Orcish) - Orcish for "Noob". Refer to term "Noob", "Gank", "Horde".
Noob - A low level/amateur/crap player. Roughly translated to "Horde". Refer to term "Gank".
Pro - The complete opposite of Noob. Also known as Alliance. Further known as Kahooli, Kulgan, and Cenarin.
Fucktard - Fucktard. A fucking retard.
R-tard - Abbreviation of a normal "Retard".
Raid(s) - (adj. or noun) Activity to kill mobs/bosses in instances as to obtain better gears.
Mobs - Kill-able npcs in Instances. Commonly encountered in raids.
Boss - Special Mobs with fuckload of health in Instances. Killed for Epic loot or in some cases Legendary items. Accomplished only in raid groups.
Instance(s) - Map/area separated from all other areas in WoW generally used for Raids.
- Contains Mobs and Bosses.
BE - Blood Elf - a new race introduced in TBC(also known as Faggy elf).
NE - Night Elf(also known as Sexy elf).
TBC - The Burning Crusade - Expansion to WoW.
TLK - The Lich King - New unreleased Expansion to WoW.
WTF - "What The Fudge/Fuck". Attempt to express surprise.
OMG - "Oh My Gawd/God". Attempt to express surprise.
OMGWTF - Variation of "Oh My Gawd/God" and "What The Fudge/Fuck". Attempt to express surprise.
OMFGWTFH4XXOR - Variation of "Oh My Gawd/God", "What The Fudge/Fuck", and Haxxor.
STFU - "Shut The Fuck Up". Attempt to express contempt/irritation/small penis syndrome.
pwn/own - similar to term "Gank", but different with absence of small dick syndrome. Often
used instead, in conversations with friends(Alliance).
invme - "Invite me". Inquiry of invitation into party/raid groups.
ress pls - "Resurrect me please". Asking for resurrection due to death from Mobs/Boss/"Gank".
MOW - "Mark of the Wild". - Buff from Druids to increase all stats and Nature resistance.
BOW - "Blessings of Wisdom". - Buff from Paladins to increase intellect and mana regen.
BOK - "Blessings of Kings". - Buff from Paladins to increase all stats by 10%.
GBOW - "Greater Blessings of Wisdom".
GBOK - "Greater Blessings of Kings".
pewpew - (adj.) The act of being EMO. - the act of constantly bickering/bitching due to the apparent suckage and skill difference from the subject. Commonly found in the phrase "Less pewpew, more QQ.".
QQ - (adj.) The act of expressing superiority due to difference in level of skills/pwnage/ownage. Commonly found in the phrase "Less pewpew, more QQ."
Phail - (adj.) the act of failing. Also commonly found associated with the Horde. Refer to terms "Gank", "Noob", "OMFGWTFH4XXOR", "Zaga(Orcish)", "STFU".
Cenarin - lvl 70 Engineer-Miner NE Marksman Huntard. a.k.a. Me.
Kahooli - lvl 70 Enchanting-Tailor Draenai Holy-Shadow Priest. a.k.a. Wendy.
Kulgan - lvl 70 Leatherworking-Engineer Gnome Frost-Arcane Mage. a.k.a. Luckshan.
Huntard - Retard Hunter. also known as - Cenarin.
Kahooli-Kulgan-Cenarin combined - THE BANE OF ALL HORDES!
My No-Good Reasons.
Why WoW?
I guess this could easily lead to why play any games as awesome as WoW where you can:-
be either a Goblin or Gnome engineer,
a Draenai Jewelcrafters with hoofs,
roam/fly/mount/run/walk in the beautiful illusionary world of Azeroth, killing boars and bears and dragons and Hordes to your heart's content?
Where you can go stealth and /laugh or /spit or /taunt or /chicken at your enemies, when they flail around trying to see where you are?
Where you get to /flirt whoever tom, dick or harry that crosses before you, regardless of what their sexual orientations really are?
Where you get to die repeatedly again and again and again and again and to repeat that all over again when you get ganked by hordes?
Can you defend the World as a stealthy backstabbing Rogue? A great sword weilding Warrior? A polymorphing arcane master Mage? A shapeshifting Night Elf Druid? Can you do all that in the real world???
Whatever the reasons you may want to believe, there are no other reasons better than simply this:
My Expectations.
To know how to play WoW, you are expected to be proficient in the languages of English, 1337 SP33K(internet jargons), Orcish, and achieve Intermediate Level in Trash Talking 101.
Be expected to know terms like:-
Gank - (adj.) to kill noobs. Normally prevalent in players suffering the small penis syndrome.
Horde - The opposing gay fags in the World of Warcraft. Commonly found with term "Gank".
Lol - Laugh out loud - endearment to be spiteful/sarcastic/noobish/fagful/lame.
Kek (Orcish) - Orcish for "Lol".
Zaga (Orcish) - Orcish for "Noob". Refer to term "Noob", "Gank", "Horde".
Noob - A low level/amateur/crap player. Roughly translated to "Horde". Refer to term "Gank".
Pro - The complete opposite of Noob. Also known as Alliance. Further known as Kahooli, Kulgan, and Cenarin.
Fucktard - Fucktard. A fucking retard.
R-tard - Abbreviation of a normal "Retard".
Raid(s) - (adj. or noun) Activity to kill mobs/bosses in instances as to obtain better gears.
Mobs - Kill-able npcs in Instances. Commonly encountered in raids.
Boss - Special Mobs with fuckload of health in Instances. Killed for Epic loot or in some cases Legendary items. Accomplished only in raid groups.
Instance(s) - Map/area separated from all other areas in WoW generally used for Raids.
- Contains Mobs and Bosses.
BE - Blood Elf - a new race introduced in TBC(also known as Faggy elf).
NE - Night Elf(also known as Sexy elf).
TBC - The Burning Crusade - Expansion to WoW.
TLK - The Lich King - New unreleased Expansion to WoW.
WTF - "What The Fudge/Fuck". Attempt to express surprise.
OMG - "Oh My Gawd/God". Attempt to express surprise.
OMGWTF - Variation of "Oh My Gawd/God" and "What The Fudge/Fuck". Attempt to express surprise.
OMFGWTFH4XXOR - Variation of "Oh My Gawd/God", "What The Fudge/Fuck", and Haxxor.
STFU - "Shut The Fuck Up". Attempt to express contempt/irritation/small penis syndrome.
FOR THE HORDE!
(A face....only mother Orc can love~)
Burlex - God. The reason to Cenarin and Kahooli and Kulgan's existence.(A face....only mother Orc can love~)
Terms and jargons cont' :-
pwn/own - similar to term "Gank", but different with absence of small dick syndrome. Often
used instead, in conversations with friends(Alliance).
invme - "Invite me". Inquiry of invitation into party/raid groups.
ress pls - "Resurrect me please". Asking for resurrection due to death from Mobs/Boss/"Gank".
MOW - "Mark of the Wild". - Buff from Druids to increase all stats and Nature resistance.
BOW - "Blessings of Wisdom". - Buff from Paladins to increase intellect and mana regen.
BOK - "Blessings of Kings". - Buff from Paladins to increase all stats by 10%.
GBOW - "Greater Blessings of Wisdom".
GBOK - "Greater Blessings of Kings".
pewpew - (adj.) The act of being EMO. - the act of constantly bickering/bitching due to the apparent suckage and skill difference from the subject. Commonly found in the phrase "Less pewpew, more QQ.".
QQ - (adj.) The act of expressing superiority due to difference in level of skills/pwnage/ownage. Commonly found in the phrase "Less pewpew, more QQ."
Phail - (adj.) the act of failing. Also commonly found associated with the Horde. Refer to terms "Gank", "Noob", "OMFGWTFH4XXOR", "Zaga(Orcish)", "STFU".
Cenarin - lvl 70 Engineer-Miner NE Marksman Huntard. a.k.a. Me.
Kahooli - lvl 70 Enchanting-Tailor Draenai Holy-Shadow Priest. a.k.a. Wendy.
Kulgan - lvl 70 Leatherworking-Engineer Gnome Frost-Arcane Mage. a.k.a. Luckshan.
Huntard - Retard Hunter. also known as - Cenarin.
Kahooli-Kulgan-Cenarin combined - THE BANE OF ALL HORDES!
My No-Good Reasons.
Why WoW?
I guess this could easily lead to why play any games as awesome as WoW where you can:-
be either a Goblin or Gnome engineer,
a Draenai Jewelcrafters with hoofs,
roam/fly/mount/run/walk in the beautiful illusionary world of Azeroth, killing boars and bears and dragons and Hordes to your heart's content?
Where you can go stealth and /laugh or /spit or /taunt or /chicken at your enemies, when they flail around trying to see where you are?
Where you get to /flirt whoever tom, dick or harry that crosses before you, regardless of what their sexual orientations really are?
Where you get to die repeatedly again and again and again and again and to repeat that all over again when you get ganked by hordes?
Where you get to be a
and STILL /flirt whoever tom, dick or harry that crosses before you, regardless of what their sexual orientations really are?
or strike a pose like
and STILL get invited into any raids you can find?
...and then /flirt whoever tom, dick or harry that crosses before you, regardless of what their sexual orientations really are?
...and then /flirt whoever tom, dick or harry that crosses before you, regardless of what their sexual orientations really are?
Can you defend the World as a stealthy backstabbing Rogue? A great sword weilding Warrior? A polymorphing arcane master Mage? A shapeshifting Night Elf Druid? Can you do all that in the real world???
Whatever the reasons you may want to believe, there are no other reasons better than simply this:
...are you playing this now???
The World of Warcraft truly is a gem amongst all other games - they pale in comparison to its addictiveness, that i can even safely challenge Marijuana or Caffeine or Viagra to try and get me out of my WoW life. Having topped every other MMORPGs out there for 4 years now, WoW is certainly one game i will never uninstall......change the folder's name maybe, but never uninstall
The True Alliance:
The True Alliance:
also known as The Three Stooges or in WoWdom: Kaho-Kulgan-Cen